my grandmother's compadres from the strandcare senior citizen's group visit her in the morning. they're very spirited & wish her well. just her neice, beth is morbid & says she'll pass the word along that my gran is at her last days. 

she's very ill today after vomiting black bile all night, since yesterday afternoon. my mother kept guard over her, sleeping in her room. my mother phones me to take her to doctor johnson around the corner. he's gracious enough to give us half his consultation fee back to get her to hospital immediately per taxi. his recaptionist is afton alexander who also won art certificates along with me in primary school. our neighbour latifah carts me & my grandmother to hottentots-holland hospital. they'll keep her overnight & take her to tygerberg hospital for her tests scheduled for tomorrow.  my mother rushes after work to hospital..

pastor arendse comes to our house to give communion to my grandmother... my sister is off work & we sit in for the prayers. my gran reminds me to give her my mother's aloe juice, which taste she complained about last week.

the tv channel says: "everythings always better on e"; julianne moore in "NEXT: NEXT"...

my mother escorts me & my grandmother to be submitted to tygerberg hospital. we only had to drop her off, or so we thought. she needs more x-rays taken & more tests scheduled for next month. we spend the whole day waiting, running down corridors & between floors & more waiting. 
we go home & buy cheesecake & pomegranate juice to celebrate cake day. in our driveway, uncle errol comes across the road to help her out of the car (i stupidly forget to remove the seatbelt, so she's stuck).
to sleep with migraine ...

my mother buys pomegranate juice for the house... 

ani difranco sings "i am not a pretty girl" on the nip/tuck soundtrack. i've loved her since once and only seeing her on sessions at west 54 a decade ago on tv...

my mother drops my grandmother & me off @ hottentots-holland hospital to have her replacement x-rays of her dislocated shoulder bone. the hospital lost the previous set. the young radiologist is disconcerted about her cell phone provider overcharging for something but she comments i take good acre of my grandmother - i'm not so sure because i'm upset with my generally foul-tempered gran for acting so lame & weak around other people. uncle errol is friendly enough to fetch us for home... 

... this evening godfrey sleeps in our lounge. he's sms'ed & talked to my mother & me all-day & he says he has no where else to turn to...

... quantum cosmology; wavelengths etc. etc. ...

i fetch her admission letter to the bigger hospital for her arm op. her x-rays are lost so we'll have to taxi later in the week to have new photos done. 

bargain art hunting/collecting: madonna's 'the power of good-bye' single & toni braxton's 'the heat'...

my older cousin lorraine, her daughter & my gay wed, cousin alvano visit my ill grandmother this afternoon... 

this evening lorraine's sister yvonne,my mother's old friend aunt susan beukes, miss wilma oliphant (my primary school secretary) & their friend, all of them from the church elders visit her & pray... 

'minority report' is my fave tom cruise vehicle... i think maybe the kitten should also be named tom cruise (the previous tomcat namesake no longer visits our yard)... 

thinking of sandra tru-out the movie with the theme of a lost child.

i realise the kitten is a tom when he preens himself early morning & i notice two balls i hadn't seen before... 

my family - my mother, sister, ricardo (my brother-in-law to-be) & i - sit all morning in the hospital hallway waiting for the doctor to tell us what is to happen to my grandmother's broken arm. we have to take my grandmother home because there's not enough beds. she seems much better, recuperated...

friday morning a big tip truck drops off a sand load in our driveway. our gardener, david is meant to come wheelbarrow the load into the backyard. by late afternoon it's obvious david had forgotten. before sunset i start carting the load. ricardo helps me after he gets off from work. my hands are callused.

... i've been meaning to get these albums for years & i finally find them in a discount bin @ a 2nd hand store... "without love"; "st. teresa": both album openers piqued my interest back when they were radio singles ...

"ID NO (X) NOG REFENCE LESLEY BAADJIES LB BUILDERS CELL (X) DANKIE ELDRICK STONE" sms for cv...

i escort my grandmother to the hospital to check up on her arm that’s taking so long to heal after her fall: the day staff are a lot more helpful than the night staff with our last visit.they x-ray & see that her shoulder is dislocated. my mother & i are both shocked. she has to stay behind for an op.

to the library after a week long absence. tai chi class, maia talks with us about scheduling & practical application of inner & martial arts. some newcomers attend. stephanie comes to see me about help with a business plan. both carols (van der heever & hugo) & giselle drop by.

my mother skips visting dion tonight to visit her mother in hospital. she says she already looks better.

at home tending grandmother & builders moving the kitchen sink. we postpone our visit to the hospital for her check up to tomorrow.

"Hello GRAHAM. Won't be attending 2nite. Good luck with the good work. Marcellino" sms sent...

"got lift 2 hosp. don't tell ladies yet" sms to carol...

"Will send Ann a message. Will not be able to go. Too much to do still. Keep well. C u soon." sms, carol...

"How r u getting to hospital? Are the ladies still going to lib? Do they know neither of us will b there?" sms, carol...

i run into town to buy ‘0-8’. the trains are delayed because of cable theft. on green market sq. i run into cheap, mint condition copies of 'the matrix' dvd & alanis' 'so-called chaos'. at the music stall i also make an interesting new friend, david: the connection seems narcissustic though because we both apparently like exactly the same music & philosophies.  
my sister’s boyfriend, ricardo is moving in with us temporarily because of his family feuding back home.

"Fsm meeting tomorrowe at 6PM! On 2nd floor. .. . . Grahan :-)" sms...

"Fsm meeting... tuesday 16 november (tomorrow)... 2nd Floor 37 strand street. pls RSVP. GRAHAM ...:-)" sms...

"evening. won't make 2morrow's TNT. taking ouma 2 hospital. don't worry, just check up. c u soon." sms to carol...

"Im home," sms, sean...

"Im home" sms, sean...

"Vendatta on 3!" sms to sean...

i go grocery shopping & sent to buy haircare products for my mother, when & buy opium incence because of an opium den's romance but i realize that our contemporary equivalent for an opium den woul be a 'tik-huis' (afrikaans: "meth house")...
sean visits in the afternoon. we talk about surprisingly deep issues in our lives & families (he denigrates his verbal expressive abilities but he is a visual artist by nature) & sandra calls after ages. finally ‘v for vendetta’ is on public tv tonight.

my younger gay cousin alvano’s husband, sean rides the same train as me to town, to his job. we chat. he’s a very proper roman-catholic guy. i buy ‘8-80’. i also buy a baked cheese cake @ my mother’s suggestion & a blueberry cheesecake for me & carol to share. tonight i visit the newly opened pnp store in the new strand mall next to the recently built shoprite. extra-long queue circles around the aisles. meet some young library patrons in the express queue.

"please call me" sms, mother...

"Ek is by shop hoop jy kom help sny wil ni te laathuistoe kom nie thanx jou ma" sms, mother...

carol buys me a jar of coffee as a gift for what she considers taking good care of my grandmother (!). i think the kitten’s name will be minerva because she’s her daddy’s brain-child & always chewing my locks, falling asleep – she’s obsessed with medusa, minerva's shield.

"Sterkte more. Die inligting sal uit jou stroom, baie meer as die trane wat ons nie stort oor ons oningeligde ekse. Veels geluk." sms to carol...

"Dankie!!! Miskien sien ek jou more. Skryf tot 13h30. Sit nou nog met boeke. Jy is n engel om Ouma so mooi op te pas. Ek moet jou eendag bederf. 1/2 cup coffe & 1/2 slice cake!" sms, carol...

"please call me" my mother, from her shoppe...

today is a good day... 

tai chi; reading; pets; sci-fi: 'heroes' ... dion visits showing off his new bakkie. 
falling asleep the kitten gives my biceps a tongue bath.

@ the weekly talk&tea meet aunts mary, rosie, katie & me practice the literacy card game carol devised last week. my first spoon of white sugar in a month... 

my mother allows my younger sister & her boyfriend, ricardo to drive her car (go figure!)... 

i thought the kitten had escaped thru an open door or window but i find her huddled in a corner in the master bedroom this afternoon. she licks my hand when i feed her..

there's a lump in my throat; my tears well up when i re-listen janet's 'rhythm nation' & remember the 2 decades in between hearing it the 1st time, now & all the mis-spent & lost opportunities. 
"state of the world" has secretly inspired any charitable act of brotherly love i've ever committed... 

my mother & dion are off to town leaving me granny-sitting. 
'nip/tuck' is on again sadean & cross-generational, anti-ageist sexiness... 
... i'm rich: i fall asleep on a studio couch (to bjork & realworld records); there's a usb'ed electric guitar standing in the corner; i have a new feline friend who likes my fur bed cover & a growing pot plant...

"hoe gaan dit, SAN?" sms to sandra...

there's a new visitor in our yard: a wild kitten who bites me aggressively... 

i finally listen to verity's album  i'd bought last month - impressed by the hindi/reggae fusion in 1 track... 
i fetch the kitten from next door where i'd returned it to this morning, as per our arrangement. zahier, the neighbourhood self-taught tv repair guy helps me round her up when she flees into the neighbours' car engine & around isha (nur's  ex-wife)'s house... 

'live free or die hard' on tv.

... hyperspace is amazing! 

...

to town, greenmarket sq. to buy 2 janet albums i'd seen the day before yesterday... 

'state of the world' was 1 of the 1st songs i ever recorded from the radio on a mix tape in 1989 (social consciousness & sexiness = aspirational)... 

'the hot chick' & 'deuce bigelow, male gigolo'.on tv

"Hi. Waar's jy? Was vanoggend by bib. Het Ouma se pille. Sal op 'n dag dit by jou kry. Sukkel om te studeer. Kontak jou sodra ek blaaskans het. Goedgaan." sms from carol...

"pleasure. busy man. coffee would be nice. rest well." sms to chris.

"Hi Marcellino, thx for the message and number. Sorry I missed you. Hope we can have coffe next time. Chris" sms.

... i go into town to research rosie's family history @ the archive.  not very revealing - the librarian suggests i approach dept. of home affairs. visit lucy on my way & get to briefly see khadija (fresh from yoga) who's crashing @ her place. we see an amplified thumb-piano player in the co. gardens by the slave lodge.
lucy's in a hurry to a business meeting so i visit chris nearby who's also busy with a meeting.

on my way to the station i run into an album i've been looking for, for ages: import bargain going for a song...
finally return my over due books to triangle library: javin & denver are sexily entertaining; i get to massage denver's sore arm from his new gym routine & buff new physique. 

back home i check in by the library before home-time & maureen , lorraine & i discover a hemp plant growing on the stoep... i take it home.

i learn about jelqing (penis-milking) online... i stereotype muslim as conservative but persia did inspire romance because of flourishing sexual culture.

the dogs keep me up barking all night.. my ill grandmother says i neglected her calls in the early morning... 

carol bring juice to the talk & tea meetng and marlon (who surprises us with his haircut) allows everyone to sample the pomegranate juice she brings especially for him considering the nazorite vow. he tells us about some interesting genealogical findings... .

...

gale winds sweeping outside all night... 
at the library, lorraine talks about her family history & adopted (white) mother raised muslim... 

carol (who's on study leave) & giselle, her tenant visit in the evening, to return the weed-eater & update.
dion visits with my mother coming in from town. they both leave for his place to overnite, after my mother & i finish making a dress order...