godfrey & fatima read stories to a pre-school class early morning @ the library...
late morning i'm watering our small lawn (still in the house's shade) & the neighbour's rambunctious children are playing in their garden (is today children's day?) ...

'paradise now' on tv (: hakim bey, "esoteric terror"; 'hidden empire', suicidal regicide;...).

"hi merak. is it possible that u could post the gift to (X) odeon court,(X), cape town ,pse. i am out of town. thank u, godfrey” ...

this morning maureen informs me that her son, nathir's mother-in-law passed away in the night. nathir went to primary school with me. he was christened nolan but converted to islam to marry. nolan was our class bully & had a dyslexic stutter. he grew up decent 'though & these days he's an upstanding family man.

my mother finally returns home after visiting dion all week, since sunday.
i miss an appointment at a new political youth league rally staying late at the library keeping lorraine company.

godfrey visits again. we talk...

"hi im at marcellino. i need to dry out and do therapy. i hope u"ll be ok? im gona b away 4 a while." sms from godfrey to lucy...

"Ok" - sms reply from lucy ...

"Hi my liefling. Kan jy daai 2 business plan templates scan en vir my email asb? Ek wil vi Lucy help metbevondsing. Sien jou later vandag. Godfrey" sms from lucy's phone while i'm chatting @ the library with carol & marlon ...

"What happens on the sixth?” sms to godfrey from lucy...

"hi im at marcellino. I need to dry out and do therapy. I hope u”ll b ok? Im gona b away 4 a while. love u lots. godfrrey” sms from godfrey to lucy...

“What does the CCM say?” sms to godfrey from lucy...

... sat outside staring @ the full moon with the cats in the back garden. sweet black coffee; dark chocolate... listening to 'mirrorball' and 'book of love' on a loop...

"I plant the kind of kiss that wouldn't wake a baby
On the self-same face that wouldn't let me sleep
And the street is singing with my feet
And dawn gives me a shadow I know to be taller

All down to you, dear
Everything has changed

My sorry name has made it to graffiti
I was looking for someone to complete me

Not anymore, dear
Everything has changed

And we made the moon our mirrorball
The streets, an empty stage
The city sirens violins
Everything has changed

So lift off love
Lift off love

We took the town to town last night
We kissed like we invented it
And now I know what every step is for
To lead me to your door

Know that while you sleep
Everything has changed

We made the moon our mirrorball
The streets, an empty stage
The city sirens violins
Everything has changed
Everything has changed
Everything has changed

So lift off love
Lift off love (down to you, dear)
Lift off love (down to you, dear)
Lift off love (down to you, dear)
Lift off love (down to you, dear)
Lift off love (down to you, dear)" ...

today is freedom day:

i listen to the whole 'emancipation' album (all 3 hours).

mau has learnt to enter & exit the house thru my window, since my grandmother shouts @ her in the kitchen & bedrooms (she has to mau-mau catching flak) ...

peter gabriel's 'mirrorball' is a free download!

i'd forgotten fatima's birthday last week!!...

marina calls from the org. the phonelines sound a lot better since matthew called me also this past weekend. she doesn't sound as upbeat as usual tho'.

reading outside; meditating...

after prayer: VDU screen de-magnetizes...

late nite 'madame sousatzka' on tv... thinking about youth & enculturation: i think miss isaacs was my 'madame sousatzka'.

please call [lucy] ...

please call nur/dj angelo.

please call nur/dj angelo.

red carnation growing in herb garden. there's a praying mantis living with the herbs. i haven't noticed lichen on the trees since childhood...

1st time i see 'dreamgirls'. eddie murphy's 'early "thunder"' is sooo prince/little richard/james brown.

... altercation early morning.

more self analysis before godfrey leaves for town...

the sci-fi novel draws a correlation between kingship (i ponder r.j. stewart & sacred kingship) & boardroom politics (chairman - heads of state & round tables)...

tonight i finally see 'enemy mine' on tv. i've wanted to see it since i was in primary school but no one was into sci-fi ...

please call lucy.

apparently, according to online astrology mercury is in retrograde (so communication is interrupted) ... the comm lag between me & godfrey is like an interstellar radio conversation.

more self analysis in the back garden. 2 red & white plastic chairs among 2 guava trees in fruit. godfrey notices the old pear tree bore a single rotting fruit...

the sci-fi i'm reading has space gypsies as protagonists - 'a forest of stars'... madonna declares (in 'sticky&sweet') "i'm a gypsy @ heart"; prince expounded on his gemini nature in 'lion of judah': "2 gypsy beggars, who only by grace came to b a star (a superstar!)" ...

we do some self analysis out in the backyard. the yard is visited by black butterflies ...

"Hello SAN. 1 van GODFREY se vriende, JOSIE wil die licence toets by jou kry? sy vra of ek dit kan e-mail?" sms to sandra - sending failed.

"culd not call u back earlier my email is josiea@x if it is possible mail da papers 4 learnes josie" ...

"We hope you enjoyed your birthday DIION. from Ouma, Godfrey & Marcellino. Thank you for being such a good part of our family." sms to dion...

"I miss you. Can I come over on Sunday? Thanks 4 ur love" message from lucy's handset...

godfrey is visiting ...

...my mother has me cutting the dress patterns for one of her customers who's visiting family in england: her boutique is international .

... !? ...

please call !? ...

"Marcellino, ek is lief vir jou. Ek wil nie sonder jou wees nie. Marcellino, asb. Ek wil niks meer he nie. Hoe kan ek jou laat verstaan. Asb, ek weet jys life vir my ook."

shrek2 is romantic! ...

carol buys us chocolate bars while we're waiting for sean's train (i haven't had this chocolate since childhood!) ...

"hello SAN, het jy al die sample ge-record? kan jy daai lyrics saambring as jy weer kom visit asb? mooi bly!" sms to sandra ...

... ireadthatdefensivedrivingisaboutawarenessofthespacearoundthevehicle... posting: ;helplibrarystudentwithhomeworkassignment(bizplan): ;presidentobamaontvaboutthefutureofthespacerace...

i sleep on a black, wrought iron studio couch. always when godfrey has left, it is still folded open with me lying on one side for a week or so before i adjust it to sofa for single sleeping...

spend the day at the library.

aunt dinah drops by.
maureen is happy about the handmade 'wamkelekile' (isixhosa - "welcome") sign i finally stick up for her in the children's section.

tiananmen square documentary on ctv...
returning after lunch, i make an egg sandwich a la godfrey for fatima & carol ...

godfrey leaves for town after a phone call from his ex-employers to meet. we slept together but apart - he reaches out but i feel distant. later, synchronicity with godfrey's ongoing playlist : when peter gabriel & kate bush in 'don't give up' sing about having friends, the tv talks about childhood friendships...

my mother sleeps over @ dion's in town.

late nite there's a movie about nikola tesla, starring george orwell as supporting actor on ctv ...

the salon side of the boutique is flooded this morning - apparently the basin tap fixture wasn't sealed properly saturday afternoon. clean up ops - 1st time i hear madonna's "revolver" over airwaves ...

i'm very disturbed about news headlines of conservative mobs in senegal disinterring gay departed to desecrate the corpses publicly. godfrey consoles me when i reveal why i'm so morose. since december i've been following the sad drama gay malawian couple steven monjeza & tiwonge chimbalanga, who were jailed, are enduring.

sandra visits this afternoon, surprising godfrey & we debrief about the world...

caleb calls about me joining org staff but i decline because of the earlier comment by another staffer about piercings looking unprofessional - we part sourly.

the car is in the mechanic's shop so my mother has to commute by train. she meets me & godfrey @ the library. he escorts her home.
later : after i exit the library, i'm attacked by 3 rabid, muttish dobermanns - a homeless guy drifting around the library chases them away...

on cape town tv a tedglobal speaker comically talks about definitions of 'success' & mentions classical tragedy as the opposite on a spectrum with tabloid press.

sandra revisits with a bottle of red & we all start composing a ballad. she leaves @ midnite ...

"Hey man, how's it going? I need you to get your tests done to find out if you qualify for staff. I'm sure you do but it needs to be done before we can consider anything els, then we can talk about the good stuff." sms from scientology staffer, caleb...

on the beach with godfrey, lucy, melissa, juanita & 1st time meeting taz. we spend the day on harmony park's lane
View Larger Map with all the parked cars continuously harassed by circling police. we're harassed by the drunk off-duty policemen in the parked team next-door. lucy delivered a heritage lecture to strand community workers in the morning. godfrey overnites - we talk...

...hung over all day.
i pass on helping cynthea with her food packages for a community event.

Cell C notification: missed call ...

the overloaded taxi plays madonna on my way into town: "heartbeat"
... & "miles away"

& the 2-timing gogolos' anthem :
... & "she's not me"
...

i meet samantha in the central library reading room helping a friend study for her drivers licence test. a x-tian converted hindi brahmin preaches to me, reading a sophian book about 'st. mary magdalene'.

'sticky&sweet' dvd watching party @ lucy's place this evening : MADONNA is showmanship
godfrey is very moved by the tianamen square images in the "get stupid" interlude...

"evening BLAZE. please remember the ccomputersoftware for PARFAIT's camera tomorrow. thank you." sms to blaze...

carol feels to show off my delapidated/mended faux-fur jacket to an amused regan (who wants his large-size clothes also mended) ...



the produce in the food garden are maruaded by pestilence - bugs are eating all the cauliflower leaves. it won't be producing food this season ...

cloudy all morning...
got 'sticky&sweet' : madonna on the playground ... visit academy & chat with "nanna", serena (dressed all-black), stacey & see elli...

drop by health4men & see renaldo.

drop by cape town org to see clarence (caleb's father about vacancy caleb informed me about) he's occupied & suggests i return another day - he comments that the piercings are unprofessional, i think that's quaint...

find bjork's 'sugarcubes' album in 2nd hand store.

the train ticket prices are increased.
spotty clouds clearing; overcast walking homeward on the beach.

after we close the library the aunties are re-telling a local soapie. maureen is updating lorraine, who regrets not having a tv set @ her new apartment across from the library ...

madonna does science fiction (a la tina turner's mad max' "auntie entity" & janet - both madge & j with the big bangs supposedly hiding brow lines) & a version of "like a prayer" that is a real religious experience. nothing worthwhile on tv (last nite i missed 'the big bang theory')...

walk along beach to sort out some nonsense with telkom & our municipal accounts...

get copy of 'die another day' @ 2nd hand shop...


... as a late birthday gift for godfrey ...

...Good Day - attend to cardinal prayer times.

maxine visits my mother & cynthea. they have a friendly argument about non-sense ("he said/she said"; "woulda, shoulda, coulda" & maxi's rumoured children?)...
there's nothing on late nite tv interesting... i need to get a fucking life!

madonna : "I`m so stupid
`Cause I used to live
In a fuzzy dream
And I used to believe
In the pretty pictures
That were all around me
But now I know for sure
That I was stupid" - 'i'm so stupid' ;

madonna : "i just woke up from a fuzzy dream,"- 'miles away' ...

i realise my alcoholic; artistic; disadvantaged; distant & passed father was also very francophile ... from an old perfume box on my mother's bedroom table.
growing up, our house's front door opened to a painting of mont-martre & our lounge had a print of the arc de triomphe ...

i watch 'gossip girl' - fucking hell!: i'm acting brain-dead.

"Greetings moffie hoe gaan dit, i pray u well +taking good care of yourself. I think of you often, I got some more work from the City, follow on Workshop from the last one, die Here wiet alleen eks blessed, also working on the panel discussion 4 the 18 May, so Im busy, i shall see u take care love 2 Marci, Ouma +the cat x” sms from lucy to godfrey...

call from jo'burg org - caleb is interviewing for his post replacement because he's advancing. he talks about o.o.b.e.'s...

'kung-fu hustle' is on tv. i've always switched off when it's been on before. the cartoonish violence of the opening scenes seemed too gratuitous (especially the young woman who gets shot).
i get now the matrix-ey resurrection message on easter sunday...

maxine visits, from ladismith (maxi opened a hair salon sponsored by a philanthropic client) looking for my mother, who's visiting dion.

"Staff can AUDIT their family for free. Thought you'd want to know" - sms from caleb on org staff...

2 gryphons sighted on tv "hairy pothead" followed bi 'lion, witch & wardrobe' (queeer! - leo, my fave sign; a fabulous fag-hag & a closet... ) ...

'basic instinct' is on late-nite. it's different to how i recall it - tamer.

next door nur/"dj angelo" & isha's daughter comes to our door to show off her excellent report.

jason statham is very sexxxy in the cartoonish 'transporter 2' on tv.

"Reading study guide. Realising potential of harnessing your skills & that of Sa & El to create an income. Ons moet hieroor praat." sms from carol ...

"Take care and play safe over the long weekend - remember that substances can lead to mistakes. Regards the Health4Men team."

midnite meditating in the garden.
we sleep in the same bed but nothing happens.

April FOOL's dae ...

calm. relatively uneventful...
godfrey & me communicate thru music playlists on the 'puter


the 1st time i really hear 'snow on the sahara':
"Only tell me that you still want me here
When you wander off out there
To those hills of dust and hard winds that blow
In that dry white ocean alone

Lost out in the desert
you are lost out in the desert

But to stand with you in a ring of fire
I'll forget the days gone by
I'll protect your body and guard your soul
From mirages in your sight

Lost out in the desert

If your hopes scatter like the dust across your track
I'll be the moon that shines on your path
The sun may blind our eyes, I'll pray the skies above
For snow to fall on the sahara

If that's the only place where you can leave your doubts
I'll hold you up and be your way out
And if we burn away, I'll pray the skies above
For snow to fall on the sahara

Just a wish and i will cover your shoulders
With veils of silk and gold
When the shadows come and darken your heart
Leaving you with regrets so cold

Lost out in the desert

If your hopes scatter like the dust across your track
I'll be the moon that shines on your path
The sun may blind our eyes, I'll pray the skies above
For snow to fall on the sahara

If that's the only place where you can leave your doubts
I'll hold you up and be your way out
And if we burn away, I'll pray the skies above
For snow to fall on the sahara " :


...

godfrey leaves for cape town early afternoon. our morning is very relaxed, civilized & companionate ... he was given tickets to attend this weekend's cape town jazz festival.